Point of No Return Page 10

  I lay grasping him, gasping. He was everything, all I wanted, all that there was.

  He groaned, then kissed me again. With deft hands, he rolled over on me, our bodies still attached, and began again.

  We made love over and over, almost frantically, coating ourselves in sweat and secretions. When my endurance gave out hours later, he laid me back on the bed and just kissed me. “I don’t want to stop touching you, Sar.”

  I let out satisfied sigh. “Please don’t, then.”

  A dark shadow fell over us suddenly. Theo stopped, his arms tightening around me. “It’s nightfall,” he said urgently. “The dream’s ending. Quick, where are you? I’ll get to you faster if I know.”

  I touched his cheek gently. “You are sleeping by my side, Theo, in our bed.”

  “God, that’s a relief,” he said happily, letting out a breath. “It drove me crazy those other times, waking up alone.”

  “Hold me tight,” I said fearfully, “It’s about to end.”

  As the dream faded, his arms around me did not. In the dim light, we gazed at each other in happiness. Then our eyes widened.

  “What the hell?”

  The room reeked of sexual excitement, as expected. But this time, it also reeked of sex. Theo and I were covered in sweat, my hair damp, his wet, the bed spotted with secretions from the both of us.

  “We did in real life what we did together in the dream,” Theo said, bewildered.

  Apprehensive, I reached down between my legs, and felt the sticky wetness of semen.

  We hadn’t used any protection. I was off the pill. Oh, shit.

  I ran to the bathroom, shut the door, and sat on the toilet.

  “Sar?” Theo said, worried. “Sar!”

  “I’m okay,” I called back tearfully. “Just give me a minute.”

  What should I do? The easiest would be to call Camlyn for a morning-after pill. But if Devlin had gotten me pregnant by some incredible odds, that would abort the baby. I couldn’t do that, not if there was any chance...

  “What’s the matter?” Theo said, more worried. The door began to open.

  “Stay out there!” I screamed at him.

  Theo came in the bathroom, then crossed to me. “Why are you upset?”

  “Because we didn’t use anything,” I said tearfully. “Devlin’s going to hit the roof if you’ve gotten me pregnant.”

  Theo hugged me, but didn’t speak.

  “I didn’t know we’d actually have sex,” I said, crying. “This never happened before.”

  “We were always separate before,” Theo said softly. “Maybe this is what was always meant to happen.”

  I didn’t answer, still crying.

  Theo pulled off the top and bottom bed sheets, threw them into the bathroom hamper, and laid down some towels. “Come here, Sar. Crying isn’t going to help what happened.”

  I wiped my eyes angrily. “Neither is getting back into bed with you again.” I washed up, then left the room, shutting the door behind me. After letting the dogs out, I brought them into the basement with me, knowing they’d wake me if Theo tried to enter.

  * * * *

  The phone rang. Groggily, I looked at the clock. Seven in the morning...

  At once, the events last night crashed down on me like lead weight. God, what was I going to do?

  There was a knock at the door. “Sar, Danial’s on the phone.”

  “Tell him I’ll call him back,” I called.

  Theo opened the door, then handed me the phone. “He insists.” He turned and left, stomping back up the stairs.

  Theo was obviously upset, but I could only deal with one crisis at a time. “Hello?”

  “How was Theo?” Danial teased. “As you remembered?”

  I didn’t answer.

  “Sar? Are you there?”

  “We talked about secrets,” I said haltingly. “I told him everything—”

  “Danial knew everything?” Theo griped angrily from the other extension. “You told him and not me? Jesus Christ, Sar, you’re supposed to tell me, not him—!”

  “I hear you’re not finished talking, so I’ll let you go,” Danial said, laughing. “I won’t expect to see you for a few days, either of you.” He hung up.

  I turned the phone off, just as Theo stomped back downstairs. Ghost and Darkness growled at him.

  “I’m gone for a week and I’m forgotten,” Theo said wryly, deep hurt in each word. “They don’t growl at Devlin, do they?”

  I didn’t answer.

  Theo walked past the growling dogs, then sat on the bed and took my hand. “Talk to me, Sar. Things are never going to be better than they are now between us, unless you talk to me.”

  “There’s nothing to say,” I said with a shrug.

  “Why did you tell Danial, and not tell me?”

  “He can hear it in my voice,” I replied. “He knows me better than anyone else, Theo, and he’s a four hundred year old detective. There wasn’t any way to hide it, though I tried.”

  Theo looked at me, storm cloud eyes serious. “From now on, Sar, you are to talk to me, before you tell anyone else your troubles, including Danial,” he said firmly. “I’m your husband. No secrets between us, ever, not for any reason. I need to know your fears and feelings before you go around telling other men, even if you love them, too.”

  “I’m not your wife now,” I said tiredly, “Even if I was then.”

  “Don’t argue. Just agree that you’ll do that for me, please.”

  “I agree,” I said softly. “No more secrets.”

  “Good. Now come with me,” he said, taking my hand. “We’ve hungry cats to feed.”

  At once, I thought of Phantom, wondering if Devlin was feeding him happily, and having no idea my actions might have shot all our plans all to hell. Tears again flooded my eyes.

  Theo picked me up in his arms, then brought me upstairs. He’d remade the bed, and put me down on it. “You stay here, I’ll feed the pets.” He left.

  I sat there for a moment, then turned on the shower. “Damn it, I should’ve done this last night.” Quickly, I got into the cold water, and began to scrub myself clean. When I emerged, Theo was waiting for me in jeans.

  “Couldn’t wait to wash my scent off you,” he said bitterly. “Could you?”

  “I told you, I’m worried I’m pregnant—”

  “You can always have an abortion,” Theo said harshly. “If it’s mine, that is. I’m sure you want Devlin’s baby.”

  I stared at him, aghast, then my legs buckled. Theo moved fast, catching me before I hit the floor.

  “You’d better lie down,” he said worriedly. “Are you dizzy? I’ve never known you to faint before.”

  “I never have,” I said weakly. “I’m just weak because I haven’t eaten.”

  “Let me fix you some cereal,” he said, pulling the comforter over me. “I’ll be right back.”

  “Why are you being so nice?” I whispered. “You just accused me of...of—”

  “I’m sorry,” Theo said, pushing hair back from my face. “I get why you’re upset. It’s just that you know I wanted us to have one. Now that we’re back together, I can’t help hoping we can.” He got up and left, returning quickly with a bowl of cereal on a tray. “Do you want some toast?”

  “Are you cooking?” I asked wryly.

  “I can make breakfast,” Theo said defensively. “I’m out of practice, but I can make bacon, eggs, and toast. Pancakes, too, if I use a mix.”

  I began to eat, resisting the urge to cringe at the idea of boxed pancakes. “This is fine. I’m more tired than anything else.”

  “Me, too,” Theo sighed, stretching out on the bed beside me. “I’m worn out.”

  “That’s a new one,” I teased, putting aside the tray.

  He gave me a hungry look. “That doesn’t mean I’m out of commission,” he growled. Effortlessly, he pulled me into his arms, then began sliding his hands down my body.

  “Stop,” I said sharply. “We c
an’t.”

  “What do you think might happen that already hasn’t?” he asked, kissing my cheeks. “Or is it just that you don’t want me in the real world anymore?”

  I didn’t answer.

  Theo hugged me. “Please answer me, Sar. I can’t fix whatever’s wrong between us if you won’t talk to me.”

  “There isn’t any fixing it,” I said hopelessly. “You know Devlin’s got a year to make me pregnant. Like you said in the dream, he’s wanted this for a while. He’s going to be angry. If that wasn’t enough, Samuel and the other Rulers will be, too.”

  “Sar, you know if we’d been awake, I’d have used protection,” Theo said soothingly. “I’ve never refused to, even when I didn’t want to. I’m sorry I put you in this position. I wouldn’t have, if I’d had any choice.”

  “Titus said he was looking out for my interests,” I said bitterly. “But he never warned me this could happen.”

  “Demons aren’t the most trustworthy people, as a rule,” Theo replied. “I’m still surprised he freed me.”

  “I just don’t know what to do,” I said wearily.

  “That’s because you’re exhausted,” Theo said, tucking the comforter around me. “Get some rest.” He got up, and pulled on a shirt.

  “Where are you going?”

  “The dogs need a walk, and so do I.” He walked out, closing the door gently behind him.

  I sat there for many minutes, wanting to call Devlin and admit what had happened. But what if he became enraged, and sent Lash to kill Theo? What if he demanded I take a morning-after pill?

  I’d never thought of abortion before, never been in a position to even contemplate having one. My beliefs—that ‘til now had been vague at best—were going to have to define themselves clearly by the end of today. Only one thing was clear: I couldn’t tell Devlin or Danial what had happened until I made my decision.

  * * * *

  When I awoke, it was nearly noon. I was still alone. And ravenous.

  I got dressed, then went looking for Theo. He was watching TV, with Ghost lying on one side of him and Darkness on the other.

  “Good morning, Sleeping Beauty,” he said, flashing me a smile.

  “Hi,” I said uneasily.

  “We made up, as you can see,” he said, scratching Darkness under her chin. She bared her teeth in a wide smile, her eyes closed.

  “That’s good,” I said, washing my hands in the sink. “Are you hungry?”

  “Are you cooking?” Theo asked eagerly.

  “Feel like pizza? I could make some dough.”

  “I’d love that,” Theo said, coming to stand behind me at the sink. “But are you sure you feel okay? You slept a long time.”

  I turned my head, giving him an odd look. “Just until noon.”

  “That was yesterday morning,” Theo said, concerned. “It’s Thursday afternoon.”

  I gaped at him. “It can’t be.”

  He showed me the TV’s digital guide. It was indeed Thursday afternoon.

  I held onto the sink, my legs weak again. “God, what’s happening to me?”

  Theo hugged me. “You’re fine, Sar. You just went through an ordeal these past weeks. You were sick—”

  I pushed him away gently. “I was fine after Devlin healed me, better than fine. Now I feel weak again.”

  “You need to eat something,” Theo said with authority. “Go ahead and make the pizza if you want to, but I’ll make you a sandwich in the meantime.”

  I nodded. “Okay.”

  Theo was right. After devouring not one but two sandwiches, I felt much better. The savory smell of cooking pizza also added to my good mood.

  Theo took my plate. “Can we talk now?”

  I nodded.

  “Sar, don’t worry,” Theo said confidently. “I’ll talk to Devlin. I’ll work something out.” He took my hand. “I was worried when you went to Hayden. Was everything...you, um, had a good time?” He winced.

  I rubbed my eyes. “He was moody, but it was fine.”

  “Are you telling me the truth?” he said, making me look him in the eyes. “Remember, no secrets.”

  “He hurt me, then healed me,” I said flatly. “He scared me, then acted loving. Yet I didn’t want to leave him, when it was time.”

  “That’s an effect of his blood,” Theo said.

  “I know that,” I said, irked again.

  The stove buzzer went off. Glad to be interrupted, I got up and took the pizza out of the oven.

  “We’re not done talking,” Theo said stubbornly. “Come back and sit down.”

  More irked, I went back to the couch and sat down.

  “I’ve thought about what to do, and I think the best plan is to pretend we didn’t have sex during the dream,” Theo said. “I’ll use protection from now on.”

  “And what if you got me pregnant?” I said angrily.

  “Unless you want to get one of those abortion pills, you don’t have any choice,” Theo retorted. “Most likely with everything you went through, neither Devlin or I got you pregnant. It was one night, Sar. Could it have happened, sure, but we’re not going to be able to tell for at least a few weeks if you’re pregnant. It’ll take longer than that to tell who the father is.”

  That was a relief to hear, as it was logical. “Say we do that. Then what?”

  “You keep trying with him, and I’ll use protection,” Theo said bitterly. “We’ll do that until I can find a way to get him to release you.”

  I got up, and began cutting the pizza. “You told me you wanted me to be honest. Well, I’m telling you Devlin is not ever going to release me, no matter what you do.”

  Theo sighed, but didn’t reply.

  We were just finishing the pizza when the phone rang.

  “If that’s Devlin, hand me the phone,” Theo said in a steely tone.

  I got up, and picked up the phone. “Hello?”

  “Sar,” Devlin purred. “How is it having Theo to yourself again?”

  What was I supposed to say that wouldn’t anger either Theo or Devlin? “I’m getting used to it,” I said finally.

  “I’m glad you’re content with his prowess,” Devlin said coolly. “I want to see you this Friday, as I told you previously. Get here at dusk tomorrow, or before.”

  “Give me the phone, Sar,” Theo growled.

  “I’ll be there, Dev. Theo wants to talk to you,” I said uneasily.

  “About what?” Devlin said curiously. “There is nothing for us to talk about.”

  Theo picked up the other extension in the living room, and put it to his ear. “There is something to talk about. I want to cut a deal with you, Devlin.”

  “What kind of deal?”

  “I know what you did to Sar,” Theo growled, furious. “She told me everything. I’m grateful you saved her life, but your sexual relationship with her ends here. She is not coming to you Friday.”

  Devlin laughed luxuriantly, sending chills down my spine. “Who are you to tell me anything?” he purred. “I was loving women when your great-grandmother was not even born. I know what Sar likes and I’m going to give it to her on a regular basis, forever. We’ll be copulating long after you are rotting in your grave—”

  “You can give her enough of the virus in your bite, or by giving her your blood. I know you’re Oathed. But that doesn’t mean I’m letting you terrorize her. She says you hurt her the last time you had sex.”

  Devlin didn’t answer. I felt instantly guilty for having told Theo what happened, but I couldn’t apologize for the truth.

  “I’m not saying that you can’t have her blood. Danial can chaperone you, so you don’t hurt her doing that. You don’t need to—”

  “It’s true, I don’t need to,” Devlin said seductively. “But I want to, Theo. Moreover, I’m going to. Sar enjoyed our sex. If she told you otherwise, which I doubt, that’s an effect of renewing your bond. Titus said she’d act oddly.”

  “Dev, you did scare me,” I said gently. “You did hurt
me, then heal me.”

  “I thought you understood that,” Devlin said, taken aback. “I explained my actions.”

  “That didn’t make them right,” I said, uncomfortable. “But we can talk it over on Friday.”

  “Yes,” Devlin agreed. “Of course, Love. I’m looking forward to seeing you.”

  “She isn’t coming to you,” Theo growled.

  “Remember to stay off the pill,” Devlin said to me, as if Theo hadn’t spoken. “There is a good chance you could be pregnant, and I don’t want you to miscarry.” He turned menacing. “Theo, you had better be using protection with Sar or I’ll geld you the next time I see you.”

  “Yes, I have been,” Theo lied smoothly, his eyes on mine.

  I looked back in shock. When had he learned to lie that well?

  “But I’m not going to next time unless you promise not to hurt her,” Theo growled.

  “You will do it, or I’ll send Lash for your head, end of discussion,” Devlin snarled. “The same goes if you hinder her coming to me in any way, Cat.”

  Theo didn’t respond; his eyes locked worriedly on mine.

  “I don’t hear you telling me your acquiescence,” Devlin purred dangerously. “Lash is beside me, waiting for your answer.”

  “I’ll do it,” Theo growled. “For now.”

  “Good,” Devlin said curtly. “Sar, I’ll send someone for you Friday morning.”

  Another ride with Lash. Ugh. “You don’t need to send anyone to bring me, Dev. I’ll drive to you. I can leave about noon—”

  “No, an escort is safer,” Devlin replied. “I would send Titus to you, but he’s busy fooling with that poison Danial let him have. Supposedly it’s very potent.”

  He clearly wanted to use it on Theo. My expression turned to fear.

  “Wear that silver colored sweater of yours for me,” Devlin continued. “I liked it.”

  “All right,” I whispered. “I will.”

  “Devlin,” Theo said, desperate. “What would it take for you to leave Sar and I in peace? I know you don’t care about money. But if you leave her alone, I’ll do anything you want—”

  “You’d work for me? Kill for me?” Devlin purred. “Anyone I asked you to?”

  Theo looked at me for a long moment, his eyes emotional. “Yes.”