Her Secret Read online

  I’d never attributed any particular scent to Devlin. In the time I’d spent with him, I’d either been too nervous, scared, pissed off, or in the case of our interlude, overwhelmed with the many other wonderful things I was experiencing to notice one. But when I’d been in the midst of a craft fair with Elle and my mother two days ago, I’d known the singular scent instantly.

  It had taken the better part of a half hour to search though the table of scented candles and essential oils where the smell was coming from. Part of that was my instinct to first try scents I considered sexy, like musk, sandalwood, leather, and even Danial’s particular scent, which was like spicy nutmeg and cedar. It wasn’t until I’d given up on the candles and reached the more unlikely named oils that I found what I was looking for: Myrtlewood.

  I’d held the vial in my hands, knowing it was a mistake to buy it. I wanted to so badly, desperately. So I had taken one last smell, then reluctantly put it back. Later that day, as we were leaving, my mother had surprised me with the vial as a present.

  “I could see you liked it,” she said with a smile, handing me the package. “I know they’re overpriced, but it’s only money.”

  “Thanks,” I said, grabbing the bag in my eagerness. “You shouldn’t have.”

  The clock chimed in the other room. Reluctantly, I conceded it was past time for bed. I put the vial back, pulled the bathtub’s plug, and put on pajamas. Then I stoked the fire, loading on enough logs to last until morning. The nights were cold now, with winter almost here.

  When I let out Darkness, my large black cat, Cavity, was waiting on the stoop.

  “What are you doing out there?” I asked him. “Theo must have let you out by accident. Get in here.”

  Cavity didn’t need a second invitation. He dashed inside and curled up near the wood stove next to a sprawled out and sleeping Jess, my black and white cat of the same age.

  I let in Darkness and then turned off the lights, leaving one on for Theo out of affection rather than need. He had an animal’s night vision, and could see in the dark as well as our pets could. I smiled, thinking of the evening we’d first met, when he’d been wearing sunglasses at night. Sure, he was impulsive, and quick to anger. Yet he was also very easy to love.

  As I lay in bed waiting to sleep, I thought back over how we’d first been drawn together years ago. A shared, magically-induced dream had started it, the catalyst a kiss. Still, we’d remained apart, not knowing we’d each shared the dream. After Danial and I had split months later, and he’d moved on to an old rival of mine, Terian had admitted dosing me with a spell that made a shared dream possible. When I’d called Theo to tell him what had happened to us, he’d come to me. It was that same, shared dream Terian had recreated last Spring that had called Theo back to me, causing him to split up with Aspen. We’d married that same morning.

  I smiled again, thinking of those few days I’d spent with him out West. They had been uncomplicated, just him and me, sun and sex with the mountains all around us. I wanted to be back there now. But perhaps the reason those days had been so good was that they hadn’t lasted long. They had taken on a golden quality for me, as the dreams we’d shared did.

  I looked over at the dresser. The cougar Theo had carved for me was there, in front of it the carving he had done of me naked, my hair falling down around my body to cover me. Though they’d been carved years apart, I always thought of them as a two-piece sculpture, The Woman and The Cougar. Strange, I never remembered to tell him that...

  As I eased into sleep, Theo came in. But he didn’t speak and neither did I.

  * * * *

  The next morning passed quickly. I slept late, then spent much of the remaining time making chili. As soon as I began chopping up the meat, Theo appeared.

  “Chili?” he said, scenting the air. “Texas Red?”

  “Of course,” I said, giving him a smile. “I wanted to make you something for dinner later. Do you want breakfast?” Glancing at the clock, I amended, “or lunch?”

  “I’ll wait for dinner,” he replied. “I’m not that hungry.”

  This was a first. I looked at him questioningly.

  “I had a few pounds of meat last night,” he said, looking guilty.

  I knew what that meant. I took a slow burn, but tried to control my anger. “Theo, we’ve been over this,” I said, angry and anxious. “You know it’s not safe for you to change here, at least not outside the barn. All you need are some assholes jacking deer to see you, and they’ll put a few rounds in you just from sheer excitement.”

  Theo opened his mouth, but I held up my hand. “I know, I know, they won’t kill you. But they’ll tell all their friends that they saw you. There will be a mass of hunters here then, shooting at everything—”

  “I know,” Theo said patiently. “I didn’t change outside. I helped Ghost to catch a few rabbits, and then we went into the barn and ate them together. I changed inside the barn, Sar.”

  Though grossed out by the idea of consuming a whole raw rabbit, much less a few, I kept a straight face. Theo needed raw meat as part of his diet to be healthy, being were. Elle was the same way. Still, there was no getting around my jumping the gun. “I’m sorry for accusing you.”

  I moved meat around so I could brown more of it. “I’m just worried and nervous—”

  “It’s okay,” Theo said, hugging me. “I know how anxious you are. I’m the same way.”

  I leaned against his strong body, and tried to relax.

  “Sar, is there enough meat here?” he added, measuring the piles with his eyes.

  “It’s six pounds worth, what the recipe calls for,” I said patiently. “You want more?”

  “I think you should add more,” he said, giving me hopeful teasing eyes.

  I raised an eyebrow at him very slightly. “How much more?”

  “Say another two pounds?” he replied, an optimistic smile on his face.

  I laughed, and then got out more meat. “Fine, you chop it up.”

  “Sure. Hand me that knife.”

  In a half hour, the meat was all browned, and the chili was simmering nicely. Glancing at the clock, I saw it was after eleven. If I left at two, I’d get there a little before three.

  I turned to Theo. “I’ve got about three hours. Do you want to watch a movie?”

  “Sure. Let’s watch V for Vendetta.”

  I resisted the urge to groan. Theo knew that movie by heart now, even quoting some of the lines to me when we watched it together. Still, he was making an effort. “Sure.”

  As we watched, I contemplated the similarities between V and Theo. They both had scars from torture, and like V, Theo always was armed with both weapons and a plan. But the most comparable thing was their aptitude for revenge.

  There was so much about my life and his that would have been different, if not for his being taken from me for those years. We’d have been married for over two years, not just six months. I wouldn’t have had Theoron with Danial. Subsequently, vampires wouldn’t be hunting me, thinking I was the answer to a question that had plagued them for ages...

  I shuddered at that, and dropped the whole mental conversation, and got myself back into the movie. “I wish I had her strength, her fortitude,” I said, referring to the heroine.

  “You do,” Theo said lovingly, with a touch of pride. “You never give in, either.”

  I felt a momentary stab of guilt, thinking how I’d given in to Devlin. “What do you like about this movie best?” I said quickly.

  Theo took a moment before answering. “That V holds the course,” he said finally. “He never gives up, though it takes him many years. And also the idea that ideals and revenge are worth dying for.”

  I’d thought that might be it. I was sorry I’d asked. “I think it’s sad. She could’ve been with him, if only he’d worn armor. He’d planned everything else out so well, he should have found a way for a happy ending.”

  “He wanted to die, Sar. He’d had enough.” There was a note of
finality in Theo’s voice. “Sometimes there can’t be a happy ending.”

  The stove beeped. Glad of the interruption, I got up and added cornmeal to the chili. “This should be done in another half hour.”

  “Good, I’m hungry,” he replied, his eyes on the screen.

  Not wanting any more grim talk, I didn’t reply. I’d just finished and sat back down with Theo when Terian suddenly appeared out of thin air, scaring the hell out of us. I recoiled and let out a scream; Theo was already moving, putting his body in front of mine to shield me. He grabbed for his gun, but he wasn’t wearing one.

  “Sorry!” Terian said with a wicked smile.

  “Jesus, Terian!” Theo shouted at him, rattled. “Just because you can teleport doesn’t mean you shouldn’t call first to tell us you’re coming! What the fuck are you doing here?”

  “I’m here for Sar,” Terian said, with an apologetic look. “Danial said this was the safest way. No worries about her getting in an accident on the way, or anyone trying to grab her.”

  I narrowed my eyes. Danial had sent Terian to teleport me so he’d have me for those two extra hours I wouldn’t be traveling.

  “That’s bull. He just wants her with him that much longer,” Theo growled.

  “Hey, I just follow orders, same as you,” Terian said mildly. Then he looked at me.

  “And this is safer, really. If this is going to be a regular thing on Saturdays, anyone looking to take Sar would know her trips by truck to and from Danial’s house would be the best time to grab her.”

  “You’re right,” I said, nodding. “We can do it this way from now on.”

  “I’m just sorry I didn’t fry that vampire when I reduced his home to ashes weeks ago,” Terian replied. “But no one’s seen him since the attack a month ago. Danial’s put out a contract on his life, but we’ve had no takers. Nothing’s surfaced about his whereabouts.”

  “I’m going to collect on that bounty,” Theo said evilly. “Soon as he raises his head out of the dirt.”

  “Sar, are you ready?” Terian asked bluntly.

  “I can leave here at two or so, but not before,” I said firmly. “Theo and I were just going to eat a late lunch, and then walk the dogs. Danial told me to get there at three.”

  “Why don’t you stay for lunch, Terian?” Theo said, flashing a satisfied smile. “Sar made a ton.”

  “Sure,” Terian said, dialing his phone. “Brace yourselves, though. Danial’s not going to be pleased. He was ready for Sar about five minutes ago.”

  Uneasy at his wording, I got up, and began dishing out the food as Terian called Danial. He hung up shortly after, his expression irritated. “He said to be there as soon as we could.”

  “Three is fine,” Theo said, handing Terian his plate. “Take your time and have seconds.”

  “Since you’re both hungry, I’ll save time and walk the dogs,” I said quietly to Theo. I left the room and began putting on my jacket.

  “Wear your vest, if you’re going out alone,” Theo reminded me. “And don’t go far.”

  “I won’t,” I replied neutrally, then grabbed my bulletproof vest. Grimacing at its added weight, I strapped it on, then put my jacket on over it. “Come on, guys.”

  Ghost and Darkness surged out the open door, running down the stairs. I walked after them, my mind burning through question after question.

  What if this situation eventually broke Theo and me up? He was already jealous. How would he act if I needed Danial more than once a week? Worse, what if I asked Danial to bite me again? Would he have enough self-control not to, no matter what I said or did? Unlike Devlin, I knew which of Danial’s buttons to push to make him angry enough to lose his reason.

  No matter how this played out, one thing was certain: The Lust would change the current dynamics. Danial and I had been adjusting to our new platonic relationship like a divorced couple who shared a child. With intimacy every week, we were sure to grow closer again. He was already expecting me to come when he called, as he had when we’d been together. He loved me, and he’d lost me twice now to Theo. When the time came to stop seeing each other, it was unlikely he’d let me go without a fight, which could only end with me breaking his heart again.

  Using him like this wasn’t fair. But what else could we do? I kicked at a rock, and kept walking. I came to the end of the field and kept walking into the forest, the dogs at my heels. Who cared what time it was? I wasn’t ready to leave yet, so everyone was just going to have to wait.

  Minutes passed. The bright sun, the dogs’ exuberance, and light singing of the birds slowly wore down my anger, replacing it with calm. As I walked back through the forest towards home, I admitted I was looking forward to seeing Danial tonight. It might not be possible, but I hoped to have some time to talk with him before the stupid Lust raised its ugly head...

  I looked up just in time to see Cavity coming to meet us, his bulky frame walking slowly down the trail from the barn. Ghost raised his head and suddenly charged him, Darkness following. Cavity froze, then bolted.

  “Stop that!” I yelled. I took a step forward, and a gunshot rang out.

  Not surprising, it was hunting season now. There were bears around, and they had become so numerous that a season had opened on them. Some other hunting seasons, like coyote or rabbit, lasted year round. Yet the gun hadn’t sounded like a shotgun.

  Terian appeared beside me, his gun out. “We heard the shot inside. Theo said it was a rifle not far west. You see anyone?”

  “No. It’s those New Jersey people,” I said with a sigh. “They are getting ready for deer season. You know they opened the county north of us for rifles this year. There are going to be yahoos out there with 30 aught 6’s terrorizing everything—”

  I took a step toward him, and another rifle shot cracked in the air. Suddenly, something hit me with enough force to knock me off my feet.

  Chapter Two

  I lay on the ground disgruntled for a moment, then pushed up with my arms. “What the hell?”

  “Sar!” Theo ran up to me and went to his knees beside me, pulling my top half into his arms as he checked me over for injuries. “Are you okay?”

  Ghost and Darkness were barking, and circling, still protective despite their fear of gunshots. Terian stood over us, gun in hand, scanning the tree line.

  “You’re fine,” Theo said, his words rough with emotion. He poked my side gently. “But it was very close.”

  I looked over my shoulder to where he was prodding me. A slug was there embedded in my bulletproof vest, shining in the sunlight. The bullet had just caught the vest and missed the elastic strap. It the bullet had been lower, it would have missed the vest altogether.

  I sagged in Theo’s arms, hugging him. “I didn’t see anybody—”

  “Track them down,” Theo growled.

  Terian disappeared

  I couldn’t get past the bullet gleaming there in the sun. “Thanks,” I said weakly. “If you hadn’t reminded me, I’d have a hole in me.”

  “You’re going to be sore later,” Theo cautioned, helping me up. “Come on, let’s get you inside.”

  We were almost back to the house when Terian appeared, blackness oozing out of him like oily fumes. His eyes shone redly, his anger so powerful that the colored contacts he wore were unable to conceal his demonic nature. “It was a hunter,” he grated out. “He didn’t know he was so close to the farm, or that she was walking here.”

  “Did you kill him?” Theo asked, as if it was a given.

  “Of course not,” Terian said, making a sound of frustration. The blackness surrounding him ebbed, and then disappeared as if it had never been. “You can’t kill someone for an accident, even if they deserve it.”

  Theo looked over at him steadily. “Did you make sure he won’t have any more accidents like this one?”

  “I put the fear of ages into him. I told him that he’d narrowly missed shooting me. I told him that we hunted here, and if we caught him here again, he would probab
ly be mistaken for a deer. He won’t be hunting here again, and neither will his buddies.”

  I took a deep breath. “Look, I’m pissed off, too, Theo. But he’s right. We can’t just have people disappearing close to our property. Country people are understanding, but there are limits, like killing trespassers.”

  “I get it,” Theo said, irritated. “I just don’t like it. Let’s go in, the dogs are still unsettled.”

  Once we were back inside, I gave each dog a Cheweez and they settled down to chewing.

  “It’s quarter to three,” Terian said hesitantly. “We should go if we’re going.”

  It wasn’t going to get any easier. I nodded, then went and got my overnight bag. It contained toiletries, extra clothes to come home in, my explosive bullets gun, and a brick of ammo. I wasn’t going anywhere overnight without my gun again, after what had happened to me before.

  I came back and hugged Theo. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

  “Go, Sar,” he said, steady. Then he kissed me. It was not a soft good-bye kiss, but a deep and lasting kiss, as if he would possess me one last time, right here in front of Terian. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning.” He turned from me, and walked into the other room.

  Terian took my hand. In an instant, we were standing in Danial’s front yard.

  I was already trying hard not to think of Theo alone back at the house, probably going crazy. “How do you do that?” I asked Terian, falsely cheerful. “It’s amazing.”

  He grinned. “It’s easy,” he said, as I followed him to the door. “It was hard to learn, I admit, but once you get the hang of it, it’s simple.”

  “Can you teach me?”

  “I can’t,” he said softly. “You have to be part demon or faerie for this to work for you. This spell won’t work otherwise.”

  “Oh.”

  “Besides, I know you don’t really want to learn,” he added. “You’re just nervous and upset. Try to relax. Danial knows what to do. I’ll be right outside, watching over you both.”

  I took off my shoes. To my surprise, he was taking off his, too.