Lost Paradise Page 25

  “Yes, I’m Aspen. This is my daughter, Heather. You must be Elle.”

  “I’m her husband, John,” a gruff man said, appearing from behind her and extending his hand to Theo.

  I breathed a huge sigh of relief, as did Theo. “Good to meet you, John,” Theo said, shaking his hand. “This is my wife, Sar, and our daughter, Elle.”

  “You smell a little odd. Are you cougar too?” Elle asked John.

  He gave her a smile, and nodded. “Aspen changed me,” he whispered, giving his wife a look of love. “It was love at first sight. She felt the same, but she was worried I wouldn’t love her because of what she was. I let her change me that night. We married the next week.”

  I thought my marriage had been fast, or my Oathing to Danial. I guess I just needed a comparison point like this one to feel better. “That’s very romantic.”

  “We live in Colorado,” Aspen said, giving Theo a smile. “We came up here to get away for a while.”

  “Same here,” I said, smiling as good-naturedly as I could under the circumstances. “We were seeing relatives, too. This is our last night.”

  “Give her to me,” John said, holding out his arms for Heather. “I’ll go get us a table. You need to sit down too, honey.”

  Aspen looked at him adoringly. “I’m only a week late. It could be nothing.”

  “I hope it’s something,” John said meaningfully, then looked at us. “It was good to meet you.”

  I watched him move off, wondering if he always was so forthcoming to strangers. Maybe it was just because he knew about Theo being an ex-boyfriend.

  I noticed Aspen had stayed, and was looking at Theo. “Theo, why don’t you go outside for a minute? Elle and I will wait here.”

  Theo nodded to me and then headed outside, Aspen following. Elle let out a growl, watching them leave.

  “Knock it off,” I said, handing her some money. “Go play the crane machine for a while.”

  “She tried to break you and Theo up. I don’t like her.”

  “Terian told you about her, didn’t he?”

  She nodded.

  I was going to have to have a talk with Tears when I got back. “Elle, Theo has things he needs to say to Aspen, things that he didn’t say to her back when he left. It’s okay if he says them to her now.”

  Elle didn’t reply, she just took the money and headed to the machine to play.

  When Theo and Aspen returned a half-hour later, it was obvious they had both been crying. But there was also an air about them both that something had built for a long time had finally been resolved, bringing not only relief, but also a sense of peace.

  The rest of the meal passed in a rush as we hurried to make our flight. When we were driving to the airport, I noticed Elle didn’t have her toy. “Where’s your lion?”

  “I gave it to Heather,” Elle answered, “She was making it roar. Didn’t you see?”

  “I did,” Theo said, choked up. “That was a very kind thing you did, Elle.”

  I didn’t say anything, just squeezed his hand in mine.

  * * * *

  As we were flying home, I reflected on the trip, and how well it had gone. My in-laws had been supportive and loving, the white water rafting on the Colorado River had been exhilarating, and we’d resolved the whole Aspen issue, too. There was only one thing bugging me: piano lessons.

  My in-laws had a piano. My mother-in-law had helped Elle learn a few keys during our visit, then encouraged me to send her for lessons. The trouble was the piano wasn’t one of Tutor Bill’s skills, and letting another human in on Danial’s home’s coordinates wasn’t an option. And I knew already who Danial would push for the moment Elle asked him for lessons: Devlin.

  * * * *

  “You know what I’m going to ask,” Danial began hesitantly.

  “I do,” I answered, closing the bathroom mirror. “If you want him to give her lessons, it’s okay with me.”

  “Are you sure?” Danial asked. “That means him coming here, as I don’t want Elle at Hayden.”

  That had something to do with Lash, though what the real reason was for Danial’s hatred of him, I wasn’t sure. “I’m sure. Dev will be a good teacher. He was when he taught me to sing.”

  “All right,” Danial affirmed. “I’ll ask him tonight.”

  Even with his neutral tone, I could tell Danial was very pleased, that he thought this was my first step toward a reconciliation with Devlin. I didn’t have the heart to tell him there wasn’t going to be one, no matter how much he wanted it.

  It had become apparent in the months I hadn’t been with Devlin that my feelings for him had faded. I’d always desire him for his gorgeous body, and his beautiful eyes, and the tender way he could be when he wanted to. But I was much happier with him not in my life. I didn’t miss his volatile personality. I was also worried that as soon as I popped out his girl, Devlin would start pushing for another child. He hadn’t given up on his desires. He was just biding his time.

  Chapter Thirteen

  In the second week of June, Serena finally came to visit me via Titus.

  The first thing I did was show her the garden that was just beginning to sprout. “Just because I’m not at Hayden doesn’t mean that I can’t teach you gardening,” I said with a smile. “We can talk as we dig weeds.”

  “We have three new guards, all single males. I’m busy,” she joked. “That’s all my news.”

  I chuckled. “That’s—”

  “Why don’t you condemn me like everyone else?” Serena asked me suddenly.

  How had we gotten so deep so fast? Probably because she’d had no one to talk to. “It’s not my business what you choose to do with your life,” I said with a shrug.

  “But how can you be so permissive—?”

  “Do you like having sex with the men you’re with?” I said bluntly.

  She looked unsure.

  I held her gaze. “It’s an easy yes or no answer.”

  “Yes,” she said finally. “I always liked sex. My partners are considerate and the sex is safe. And the pay is a hell of a lot more than I could make being a short order cook, not to mention the protection working for Devlin offers me.”

  “Then you enjoy your work, you make good money, and you get paid to do something you love,” I summed up. “I’d say that was better than most people’s careers.”

  “You are the oddest woman I think I’ve ever met,” Serena said, tilting her head. “And I’ve met some odd ones.”

  “I get that a lot,” I said, grinning. “I’m not sure why.”

  “There’s also a new maid,” Serena said. “She’s a werewolf.”

  That was a little much for me, a real werewolf. Strange that the idea was so peculiar to me, when I was surrounded by all kinds of other real life non-humans. “How is she?”

  “Robin’s nice,” she said. “She does a good job cleaning and keeps to herself. We’ve been spending time, as the bears don’t really like her—”

  Wait, a werewolf named Robin?

  “—she’s living in the basement, she said she prefers it, it’s more like a den to her.”

  Well, whatever made her feel at home. I hoped she wasn’t spending time in the dungeon. “That’s good, then.”

  “Sar, are you ever coming back to stay?” Serena said. “I miss you.”

  “I don’t know,” I answered. “Most likely not anytime soon.”

  Serena looked at me sadly, then turned the conversation back to gardening.

  * * * *

  Over the next few weeks, I put in long hours with Danial’s business. It kept my mind off Dev. My attraction to him had seemed so easy to forget with his absence, but it had returned in full force now that he was here most days giving Elle lessons.

  She had rebelled at first, refusing him as a teacher. But when Danial had threatened that it was either Devlin or no lessons at all, Elle had relented. A small upright piano had arrived the next day. Danial had had it placed just outside his bedroom. He’d d
one that deliberately; I heard the music from start to finish, no matter which room of the house I was in.

  Danial’s scheme worked. It was hard for me to know Devlin was there, so close to me, and not go see him. Devlin had skill with the piano; it sang for him, the music both breathtaking, and heartbreaking. But despite his attempts to lure me, I resisted. Each time I thought of going down to him, I made myself remember him and Catherine together. And I never went down to him.

  Lash stayed away, too. When Serena mentioned on one of her visits that he was helping clear the gardens of weeds, I gave my folder of garden ideas to her, asking her to give them to Lash for me. I’d proposed roses of fire and ice, as well as regular red and white, plus red and white tulips, white flocks, red bee balm, white violets, and black pansies for the empty spaces between; someone might as well use my ideas. Serena didn’t want to bring them to him on my behalf at first, but she finally agreed.

  Janice and Cia had been running around like crazy for the whole month of May, trying to get the former’s mating ceremony and reception planned out. I helped as much as I was able, like putting the ribbons and dates on the fox-shaped cookie cutter wedding favors. It was fun, and got me some samples of wedding cake as a bonus.

  My weight was up, but I still took walks in the forest, while the treadmill gathered dust. Now that the ice and snow had melted, there was no way I was staying inside. Experiencing the sheer exhilaration of spring becoming summer was not an opportunity to be missed.

  Danial continued to ride, but now it was Elle who joined him, with Theoron sometimes riding in front of her. Danial had wanted them both to be good in the saddle, and Elle took to it like she was born to it. The greater problem had been getting the horses to accept her werecougar scent. But with time and a lot of gentle persuasion, Poe and Annabelle Lee did. It was a pleasure, to sit on the wraparound porch on a Saturday evening, and watch them cavort in the front yard.

  I also sat down Theo early one night when Danial was away, and asked him what he thought about names. “Did you have your heart set on anything? Theo Jr.?”

  “I don’t know,” he replied. “I talked to Danial, and proposed naming the baby after him. But he said he would rather we didn’t. You know how he feels about his past.”

  I nodded. “Any second choices?”

  “Why don’t you pick the name?” Theo replied. “You haven’t been the one to make a lot of the decisions regarding your pregnancy. You should at least get to choose the name.”

  “I will then,” I agreed happily. “Let me do some searches online and get back to you.”

  * * * *

  On the sixth of June, Nineva showed up for his visit. Theo, Elle, and I went to meet him at the airport.

  I almost didn’t recognize him getting off the plane. When I had seen him last years ago, he’d just been through horrible grueling torture. Now he was beaming with health, his dark skin shining, his long hair in dreadlocks to his shoulders. Elle raced into his arms as soon as she saw him.

  “Look how big you are!” he exclaimed, his brown eyes shining with emotion.

  Theo came over, and offered his hand. Nineva just hugged him. Theo hugged him back, both of them a little teary, remembering the circumstances of the last time they had seen each other.

  “I’m glad you got out,” Theo managed finally.

  “If it hadn’t been for you, I wouldn’t have,” Nineva replied. He turned to me. “Sarelle.” He hugged me very gently, careful of my huge belly. “You look wonderful.” He turned back to Theo. “I see you’ve been busy,” Nineva said with a laugh.

  Theo and Elle spent most of the two weeks running around Danial’s forest with Nineva. He was completely recovered from his ordeal, nothing like the pale shadow he had been when I had seen him years ago. His lion form was magnificent: all golden fur, wild mane, and tufted tail, with the loudest roar I’d ever heard.

  With Nineva staying with us for his visit, it quickly became apparent to him that Danial, Theo and I were sharing the same bed.

  “I told him, Sar, when he asked me,” Theo said one night. “All of it. And he said if you ever needed to hide, to get away, he would do his best to keep you safe. No matter who it was you were hiding from.”

  I was touched, especially knowing how much Nineva hated violence. “That’s sweet of him. But it wouldn’t work. He doesn’t know what the other Rulers are like, or what Lash and Dev are capable of—”

  “And Titus,” Theo added, glowering. “Don’t forget that monster.”

  “What do you have against him?” I said, putting my hands on my hips. “He saved you from that love spell. He saved you from poisoning—”

  “He also eats people, Sar,” Theo said coldly. “He ate Neoline, probably drank her blood first, just like a damned vampire.”

  “How can you say this?” I said, aghast. “A vampire is your best friend!”

  “Danial tries never to kill,” Theo replied abruptly. “I know he has, but he tries not to. But Titus has to. And if a being is so evil that it has to kill to live, maybe it’s better for the world if that being wasn’t in it—”

  “So you hold against Titus that he was born a demon,” I said angrily. “You’re blaming him for something that he didn’t have any choice in?”

  Theo looked at me, his expression conveying that he had never thought of it that way before. I nodded once, then walked away, leaving him to think of the similarity between Titus and himself.

  * * * *

  When it came time for Nineva to leave, none of us wanted him to. Danial even offered him a job, which Nineva declined. “I like the quiet life,” he said, giving Danial a smile. “I’ll help you if you ask, if you need me sometime, of course. I owe you a great debt, for what you did for me. But I don’t like violence, or killing.”

  I was glad then Terian wasn’t around to hear that. Nineva sounded like Terian once had, before his human nature had been influenced by his demon side. Saying good-bye to Keriam and putting his past to rest had helped Terian heal old wounds. But there was something darker about him these days. I wanted to think it was Sundown, that being with her had changed him. He swore a lot more frequently and easily, and he could be both cruel and sarcastic now, where he had not been before. Most of the fault lay with Solutions, Inc., or so I concluded. Theo and Terian didn’t kill people for profit as Lash did, but they had killed in self-defense several times in only a few months. And Terian made no pretenses about enjoying it now.

  Titus seemed to give no sign of awareness of the change in Terian, though I talked to him about my concerns.

  “Terian hasn’t changed,” he replied. “He’s steadfast in his morality, Sar. I do wish he would let his mother back into his life, though.”

  I cringed. Terian still refused to talk to Leri, or see her, though Titus was back with her now. “Devlin said you were thinking of building a small house for her and you on the outskirts of Hayden.”

  “Dev won’t let her live in the main house,” Titus replied. “Dev’s balking at my proposal, too, but I’ve sweetened the deal with something he won’t refuse.”

  “What?” I said, my tone saying that it had better not have anything to do with me.

  Titus smiled. “I offered to work the next year for him free of charge.”

  That was bullshit, but I didn’t call him on it. I had no proof. Besides, even if whatever he had offered Devlin did have something to do with me, I had nothing real to threaten him with anyway.

  * * * *

  Life remained relatively peaceful until the afternoon before the end of June, the day before Janice’s ceremony to Ivan.

  I was harvesting the garden with Serena’s help. Not much was ready yet, except a few little carrots, and radishes. This was more for me, because I shared a lot with her that I no longer could share with my one-time best human friend, Kat.

  I’d avoided Kat all spring because of The Lust. But sometimes even if you avoided people, they found you. We’d run into one another, one night when Danial, Theo, I
and the kids were all out together getting ice cream with my parents. She had seen me and come over to say hello. The moment Theoron had looked at her, she had known he was my son. Hearing him call me “Mom” a minute later had cinched it. She had also seen I was pregnant.

  She and Brett had been polite, then excused themselves. After that, she’d stopped taking my calls, though I tried her every day for the next three weeks. While I kicked myself for not trusting her, for not telling her, I rationalized this was for the best. She didn’t need me in her life, and the danger I would bring her and her family. We’d more than grown apart in the years since I’d met Danial; we were in totally separate worlds now. And like I’d told my mom, there was no going back.

  Theo hadn’t understood what her loss meant to me. He’d only had Danial for most of his adult life. He’d told me that I had a lot of friends, and not to let it get me down. But Serena had understood.

  “She was the last part of your old life,” she had said softly.

  I’d nodded, feeling the tears come. “Yes,” I said, brushing them away. “I’ve lost touch with most of my neighbors, and the people I used to work with. An elderly woman I was close to died, and her son, who I was also close to, has gotten married, and moved away. I never had a lot of friends. The only people I’m still close to that I even knew back before I met Danial are my parents.” I took a breath. “My life has changed so much, from knowing Danial. I’m happy, but I also feel like I’ve lost a lot of friends. I’m not who I was, and that bothers me.”

  Serena hugged me. “It was the same for me, when I came here. My mother died when I was young. It was a problem with having me, because of the two types of were. My father loved her very much. After she died, he crawled inside a bottle, and stayed there until I was ten.”

  I hugged her back hard, imagining what her childhood must have been like.

  “We moved to Rio,” she continued. “He tried to get clean. He stopped drinking, and got a job in the engine room of a cruise ship, and he was gone most of the time. He met a nice woman, a human. She took good care of me.”