Tempest of Vengeance Page 28

  “Take it all,” Devlin said, bending down beside him. “You need to be as strong as you were, even if you—”

  “I don’t want the power again to be Ruler,” Danial said.

  Devlin gaped at him in shock. “What are you talking about, Danial? You need to be Ruler again.”

  “No,” Danial said, sitting up. “You are most likely Ruler of the States again now, Dev. And it’s past time for me to admit I’m not the vampire you are.”

  “Danial—”

  “No, Dev,” Danial said firmly, wiping some of the blood off his face. “I was careless, and I almost lost my life because of it. I’ve had enough of playing in my brother’s shoes. I only want to go back to my company, be with my son. I’m not cut out for this—”

  Devlin grabbed Danial by his hair with a snarl, and shook him hard. Danial hissed, and his eyes went red.

  “You are going to take his blood,” Devlin growled deeply. “You are going to drain him, as he drained you, until his heart stops. We are going to rule North America together, Danial, because I need to know there is someone ready to protect Sar, should something ever happen to me!”

  “You know I’m not your equal!” Danial shouted. “Everyone knows it, Dev!”

  “You are going to learn to be,” Devlin hissed back. “Whether you like it or not, you are going to learn to be, Danial. As you said, it is far past time you did.”

  “No,” Danial growled. “No, I’m not—argh!”

  Devlin had pulled Danial to his feet by his hair. Danial staggered, having not stood for so many months, but the blood he’d taken from Ulysses was already working, already revitalizing his systems, and though he swayed, he didn’t fall.

  “Theoron has taken over your company,” Devlin went on. “Theo and Terian are helping him. He’s an adult now, Danial. They don’t need your help, having had to go it alone so many months. But Elle is still recovering, from what she went through at Ulysses’ hands. She needs you more than ever. Venus needs her uncle, she’s hasn’t seen you not ‘asleep’ in months, as we told her you were. And Sar needs you too.”

  Danial looked up then and saw me. “Who are you?” he said.

  I swayed and almost fell over, but Lash caught me in his arms.

  “You know who Sar is,” Devlin said sharply. “She is our Oathed One, and the mother of your child.”

  “She does not look like I remember her,” Danial said slowly, staring at me. “I remember Sar, remember her dying in my arms even as that demon who killed her laughed.”

  I shot a worried look at Devlin. He ignored me, gazing at Danial with puzzlement.

  Danial noticed Lash beside me, and gave him a rueful smile. “But you I unfortunately know, Lash, though you look younger than I remember you being. Where is Theo? And if this is Sarelle as you say, why is she here with you, and not with her husband?”

  Devlin came to stand beside Danial, and put his hand on his brother’s shoulder. “Many things have changed, while you were apart from us,” he said gently. “Sar, come to Danial, let him taste your blood. He will remember that, even if your form is unfamiliar to him.”

  I walked over to Danial and hugged him, not caring that I was getting blood all over my shirt. It’s enough that he’s awake, and talking again. Danial hugged me back, the familiar feeling of his arms around me comforting.

  Danial separated from me, looking at me expectantly. I tilted my head to give him access to my neck vein. Without preamble, Danial bit down gently into my flesh. I winced in pain, but made no noise, holding him close, tears slipping out even as I tried to blink them back. He made soft noises of contentment as he fed from me, but gave no other response. As the seconds passed without anything more, I grew more worried. Dear God, let him remember me. Let my blood be close enough to what it was to trigger his memory.

  Danial pulled back from me, giving my neck a gentle kiss to heal it. “Dev, this is not Sar. Her blood is not as it should be, like spring.”

  My stomach roiled, as I felt Lash come up behind me again, and take my hand. I squeezed his hard, trying to breathe quietly, wanting this moment to pass, for Devlin to fix it somehow, for the romantic reunion I’d dreamed of to magically replace this heartbreaking nightmare I hadn’t anticipated.

  “You know how much I loved Sar, as you did,” Danial went on. “But I can taste this is not her, though this woman’s blood is unusually close, almost like summer.”

  I turned to Lash with a sob, and he hugged me, stroking my hair. “Shh.”

  Danial noticed us, his attitude becoming spiteful. “Obviously, this is one of your...women you share with Lash. Sar loved Theo, she was his wife, she would never have touched Lash, not in a million years.”

  “I’m telling you this is Sarelle,” Devlin said, his tone bitter. “It is you who are not remembering right, Danial. Sarelle fell in love with Lash this past summer.”

  Danial bared his fangs in a vicious snarl. “Why are you doing this, trying to pass off one of your whores as the love of my life?”

  “Can you not see how much she cares for you?” Devlin said abruptly, his tone switching suddenly to umbrage. “You are tearing her heart out with your words, with your denial of her! Stop being such a thoughtless bastard!”

  Danial turned to me, his face smoothing into the polite mask that he wore at his Hallow’s parties for the clients he didn’t care for but felt he could not be rude to. He came to me, took my hand, and kissed it. “You should go and change clothes,” he said softly. “I’ve made you a mess, Lady. But I thank you, for your blood.”

  I nodded, and darted from the room, Lash coming after me. At the door, I turned for one last look. Ulysses was still moving weakly, trying to crawl away. Danial grabbed him roughly, and then sank his fangs to the hilt in Ulysses’ neck once more. Ulysses let out a cry of pain, his desperate eyes locking on mine in an unspoken plea. Devlin shut the door softly, blocking my view.

  “Come.” Lash led me to Devlin’s room, and helped me take off my clothes, and get in the shower. He locked the door, then braced it with a chair. Then he took off his clothes as well, and got in the shower with me, putting his gun within reach. For a long time we just stood under the spill of the water, holding each other silently.

  “I’m sorry,” Lash hissed sorrowfully.

  I hugged him, saying nothing. What was there to say? I was sorry, too, that Danial didn’t remember me, that he was confusing me with Anna, or some other woman. It’s something that he remembers a Sar who he did love once. For now, that’ll have to be enough.

  * * * *

  Devlin carefully broached the subject early the next morning, when he, Lash and I awoke before dawn.

  “Danial still loves you, Sar,” he said, caressing my back. “But his memories are not what they were. I don’t know if it is temporary or if it is permanent damage, from him being without a heartbeat for so long. Titus said if his memories were altered, that it would be permanent. He does not have amnesia. This is not a daytime soap opera, unfortunately.”

  “What does he remember me looking like?” I murmured, my back to him. “Is he confusing me with Anna?”

  Devlin eased closer to me, and wrapped his arms around my waist. “You need to brace yourself.”

  I tensed beneath his touch, waiting anxiously.

  “Spit it out, Dev,” Lash hissed, his fangs extended. “Tell her and stop dragging this out.”

  “There was a woman Danial loved a few years after Anna died,” Devlin continued. “Her name was Gabriella. She was the first one I took from him, and her loss was probably the hardest to bear. She died tragically, at a demon’s hands.” He paused. “He remembers his Sar as looking as she did, and not as you do.”

  “What did she look like?” I said more harshly than I meant to, as I turned over in bed to face him.

  His eyes held apprehension, the gold of them gleaming in the darkness. “You remember Angelica and Monica?” Dev said tentatively. “She looked like them. Black hair, and bright blue eyes, with maybe a l
ittle green in them.” Devlin paused, as if gathering himself. “You remember the photos of Danial and me, when we were together with a woman, or women? They were all of a type, Sar. Danial has always favored dark hair and blue eyes exclusively. At least he did, until he met you.”

  I looked away, trying not to cry, as Devlin hugged me tightly.

  How did I never see it? I’d looked for a pattern in the women that had been in the pictures I’d gone through of Devlin’s, but I had really been looking for one with Devlin. And there had been no pattern, not with him. He liked women of all coloring, and sizes, too, though he seemed to prefer buxom women, with larger breasts and hips. But Danial had always been with a dark haired woman, if a woman was in the picture. For most, I couldn’t see the color of their eyes, as the pictures had been in black and white. But there had been one small oil painting of Danial and a woman. She had been dressed in blue, with blue eyes and dark hair, Danial with his arms around her, and Devlin posing on the other side of her. Monica and Angelica looked like sisters. That woman Erica, the one he’d tried to hurt me with when we’d first broken up, Danial had said she’d had black hair and blue eyes, too...

  “Sar,” Devlin said, interrupting my thoughts, “Danial somehow thinks you should look like Gabriella did, and have Anna’s blood. Please give him time. When he is around you enough, he will see you for who you are, I’m sure of it—”

  “What if he doesn’t? What if he never remembers me, or what we were to each other? He thinks I’m dead now anyway!”

  “Shh,” Lash hissed, stroking my hair. “He will love you again in time, Sar. He fell in love with you once, and you are still you.”

  I didn’t reply. He fell in love with me because I saved his life one night. But without that, he probably wouldn’t have given me a second look. How can I be the woman he fell in love with when the woman he remembers isn’t me?

  * * * *

  The next day, when I went downstairs to make Lash and Venus breakfast, I found Danial in the kitchen. I braced myself for some comment, but he just looked at Lash and me, smiled slightly, and said good morning. I felt very odd seeing him so casually while knowing he didn’t know who I really was. To calm myself, I ignored him and focused on making breakfast with Lash. Danial stayed just long enough to get a glass of water, then left.

  Seeing my upset, Lash made no mention of Danial at all. Then Venus asked quietly, “Why doesn’t Danial like me anymore?”

  I hugged her, pushing aside my own sorrow. “He does, he’s just been through a very bad time. Please understand, V, the way he acts right now has nothing to do with his feelings for you. He just needs some time, after that long sleep he had.”

  She nodded, but her huge golden eyes remained sad.

  Devlin came downstairs, as we were finishing breakfast. Lash took him aside, and told him what had happened. He picked Venus up immediately, and went in search of Danial. I stayed with Lash, knowing it was best without anyone saying anything.

  In a half hour, Devlin was back, sans Venus. “Danial is playing with her,” he said, resting his hand on my shoulder. “He remembers her, and they are getting along fine. He was upset because he saw you and her together. The way you might have felt if you’d witnessed Monica taking care of T, when he was little.”

  “Dev, I can’t do this,” I said, taking a deep breath, and trying to be calm. “I can’t not be who I am, just because he doesn’t remember me.”

  “I will talk to him again later,” Devlin said in a soothing tone. “Don’t concern yourself. You know Danial, Love. He is polite to a fault. I told him just now if he has anything to say about you at all, he was not to say it to you, but to me. That you were mistress here, and could do whatever you pleased, and he was not to say or do anything to offend you. He agreed to this.”

  Lash didn’t comment, but his expression said he thought this solution of Dev’s was sub-optimal.

  I went for a long walk later, taking time alone to decide if I should try further to make Danial remember, or leave him alone for now. Darkness and Ghost ran ahead of me, happy the snow was only a few inches deep. Thankfully, Titus was doing a good job of keeping a trail open for my daily walks.

  After a solid hour of weighing the pros—heartfelt reunion, everyone back to normal—to the consDanial voicing again that I was one of Devlin’s whores, I decided to do it. No matter how much it hurt, I had to at least try, after all he had done for me over the years.

  About five, I fluffed my hair as Tatiana had shown me long ago, and put on a deep red long sweater. I tried to put the fox head choker on myself, but it wouldn’t fasten. It’s been too long since he’s shared blood with me. Whatever was in my system’s long gone. I debated putting on the fox head earrings by themselves, but decided against it. It may enrage him. I debated removing the diamond ring he had given me and the swirled wedding band of many colors, but decided against it. He saw that already yesterday.

  I went to one of the guest bedrooms—Danial’s new bedroom, according to Dev. His few older books of poetry were there, and the carvings Theo had made for him in their cabinet. I noticed with a jolt that the Woman and the Cougar were there too, but didn’t say anything. Because the biggest surprise was T there visiting with Danial.

  My son glanced at me as I entered, his expression distressed. “I’m going to go now, Dad. If you want to come back to work—”

  “No,” Danial retorted flatly. My mouth dropped open, as I gaped at him comically. But more surprise followed as he continued. “I spent too many years working. I should have spent them with her. I should have spent every minute with her! And it’s too late now. She’s dead.”

  “Mom is not dead, I told you—”

  “T, I loved your mother. Don’t tell me lies to make me feel better, or because you think I’ll forgive that bastard you are calling your partner.”

  “Terian had nothing to do with this!”

  “He wasn’t there, that night she was attacked! She died because of him! And I was hurt because his uncle wasn’t doing his job! Demons can’t be trusted! They’ll let you down every time!”

  “I love you, Dad,” T said, his voice rough with emotion. “But I can’t listen to this. Good-bye.”

  T strode out, and Danial reclined back on the edge of the bed. I hesitantly went in and sat next to him. He looked at me with hostility, then his expression softened.

  “I’m sorry, for your loss,” I said quietly.

  “Thank you...um...?”

  “Call me ‘Lady’,” I said, staring at him penetratingly, hoping to see a glimmer of memory surface.

  Danial just nodded. “Thank you, Lady. My son doesn’t seem to understand, but I hear compassion in your voice, something that piques my curiosity. Why should you empathize with me, since we do not know each other?”

  Danial’s words were hard, but also etched with deep sorrow. That only made his manner a trifle easier to bear. “Because I heard about what you have lost, and also about your family.”

  “That bastard Ulysses orchestrated the rape of my daughter,” Danial said, his eyes glowing red. “Devlin refuses to kill him. He said he needs him alive for some reason.”

  For Lash, in case he began to fail. I stayed silent, knowing my explanation would not give him solace.

  “I feel like I’ve lost everything that ever meant anything to me.”

  “You have your children, and your brother,” I said, putting my hand hesitantly over his. “You are alive. That’s something.”

  “You are right,” Danial said, wiping his eyes. “She can live on in me.” He let out a breath, then glanced at me. “You should go. I’m sure my brother is looking for you by now. His desires need sating on an hourly basis. But you probably know that well, Lady.”

  It’s obvious there’s not even a glimmer. I took a deep breath, and went to leave.

  “Please Lady,” Danial called softly from behind me. “I would ask that you never wear red again in my presence. Though you don’t look like my Sar at all physicall
y, there is something about you when you wear red that reminds me strongly of her. It makes me remember her, and I still feel the pain of her loss too deeply.”

  “I don’t mind, Danial,” I replied, keeping my back to him so he didn’t see my sudden tears. “It’s very touching that you loved her so much.”

  “I think about her every hour of every day. She was the love of my life, even when she was married to my best friend. When she finally agreed to be mine, to live with me, those were the happiest years of my life. Even when we were fighting, and her blue eyes would flash with fire—”

  I brushed the tears out of my eyes, and tried to compose myself enough to listen.

  “I never stopped loving her. She was so strong. She had so much heart, and hope. She was kind, too, especially to even the smallest of animals.”

  “I’m sure she loved you just as much,” I blurted. Then I bolted, before I lost it completely.

  * * * *

  Later that evening, Devlin came upstairs and settled in bed with Lash and me. I had just finished relating to Lash the crashing and burning of my big plan.

  “I’m sorry. I tried again as well,” Devlin said with a sigh as he settled himself on my chest. “I also got nowhere.”

  “Isn’t there some spell?” Lash mentioned casually. “I can’t believe there isn’t something that demon could do to make Danial remember the man he used to be.”

  “Titus said the memories themselves are altered. If Danial had forgotten, there are spells that could be used. But he said it is like a bone that was shattered, and grew back together. There are some small shards that ended up in the wrong place—”

  “Can’t Titus re-break them, then?” Lash interrupted. “It works for bones.”

  “But not for minds,” Devlin replied with a grimace. “Titus said he was amazed Danial came back as much like himself as he did. He said it is usually much worse, and to count our blessings.”