Lost Paradise Page 6

  I nodded. “As long as you take some if I ask you to.”

  “Well, of course,” Lash replied irreverently. “I’m not anxious to be hammered.”

  I let out a snort of laughter. “Sure—” Abruptly I remembered the hammer smashing Vince’s teeth, then Kev grabbing me. I sat down quickly, sickened and upset.

  “Are you okay?” Lash said, laying his hand on my arm.

  When he touched me, The Lust rose its head high. Yes…He could have me here on the kitchen table, just like he had Cin on the pool table at Davy’s…

  Madness engulfed me. The sex hadn’t helped! The Lust still wanted him. Shaking my head, I reached out, and gently pushed his hand off me. “No.”

  Lash moved back from me, leaning against the counter.

  Yes, this was just like in the kitchen at Theo’s old place. Lash had been great that night. He’d be even better here…

  I trembled, trying to push my urges away. I fought my desire to touch him, to have him, to open my mouth and tell him to take me now. Slowly the feeling passed, leaving me shaky and weak.

  The Lust had never risen so quickly again after being sated. Never. Devlin had tried one night, being in one of his moods. He had been unable to raise it once he had sated it. Lash had raised it again within minutes, with almost no effort. What was going on?

  “I smell your desire,” Lash hissed softly. “If you need me again, just say so.”

  “I do,” I whispered. “And I’m scared to death.”

  Lash came over to me, grasped my arm, and pulled me to my feet. His arms went around me. “Why are you scared?” He began backing me slowly toward the table.

  I wiped at my eyes, even as desire flooded me. “We just did this—”

  Lash pushed my pants down carefully, then lifted me to sit on the table’s edge. “That’s okay. A man likes to be in demand.” He leaned in and kissed my neck, his fangs pricking me.

  I leaned back from him, then raised a hand to his face. Carefully I touched the tip of one hooked fang that was always revealed by his scar. “You’re not a man.”

  Lash smiled wider, both curved fangs glistening as his forked tongue snaked out to stroke my cheek. “You’re right, I’m not. But I’m what you need—”

  The Lust engulfed me. Frenzied, I went for his belt buckle. Lash kissed me feverishly, as I dropped his pants. He grasped my rear with both hands, then pulled me forward quickly, impaling me. I let out a moan, and he kissed me again, devouring me as he began to thrust.

  Lash stroked my tongue with his, then ended the kiss. Baring his fangs, he sank them into my neck. Heart racing I clasped him to me, kissing his neck, his face, anything within reach.

  “Deeper,” I hissed needfully. “Harder.”

  Lash lifted my ass, then moved backwards while supporting me, easing us down into a chair. He drove in another few inches, then began to move fast, straining. My orgasm built quickly. In seconds it burst. As I began to scream, Lash withdrew his fangs and covered my mouth with his. Where I ended he began, his muscles clenching beneath me as he came.

  As The Lust faded, I pushed back slightly from him, panting, not sure what to say.

  He grasped me and gave me a chaste kiss, then released me. Carefully I stood up.

  As he came free of me, Lash let out a soft hiss of satisfaction. Then he was all business as we both put our clothes back on.

  When I was dressed, I turned to him. “I’ll stay here and wait for Devlin.”

  “You won’t have to,” Lash hissed, going towards the door. “He’s heard us.”

  Devlin’s room was above the kitchen. I flushed as Lash unlocked the door to admit Devlin, his golden eyes tinged red.

  “What happened?” he asked snidely. “You get her this far and give up?”

  Lash faced Dev accusingly, his normal humor oddly missing. “What happened is your favorite asshole grabbed Sar. He and Vince planned to rape her and blame The Lust. In the process of handling that, The Lust rose—”

  Devlin snarled, his eyes glowing red like hot embers. He gripped the doorjamb, sinking his nails deep into the hardwood with a creak. “Did you kill them?”

  “They’re in the ballroom,” Lash hissed. “I’ll take them to the dungeon.”

  “They said it was payback for me killing some of them that night you came for me,” I whispered.

  “Take them to the dungeon!” Devlin thundered. “Now!”

  Lash nodded. “Kev’s out cold for today, but Vince will recover as soon as his neck is reset. You want them healed up for you, or you want me to take care of it?”

  “Just take them there now,” Devlin answered curtly.

  Lash nodded, then left.

  Devlin grabbed hold of me, crushing me against him. “I’m sorry this happened,” he murmured. “Teleport now to Danial. Tell him you’ll spend tonight with him. I’ll come to you later on tonight, be with you there at his house—”

  There wasn’t going to be a later for us, but I felt too much guilt rejecting him right here after he’d just heard me have sex with Lash. “It was close, Dev. I’m all messed up.”

  Devlin was still apologizing. “—I’ll punish them for this, Sar. You won’t see either of them again, ever, so don’t worry. Nothing like this will ever happen again, not to you, not here at my home—”

  “Before I leave, I have to tell Serena what happened,” I interrupted, remorseful. “She cared about Vince a lot. She needs to know.”

  “I can have someone else tell her, Love,” Devlin said, drawing back from me. “You don’t need to.”

  “No,” I persisted, resigned. “A woman should tell her. I’ll do it, before I leave.” I’d be damned if would let one of those women who hated her tell her. It was going to be hard enough to hear it from a friend, especially as there was no way to downplay the circumstances.

  “Come upstairs,” Dev said, taking my hand. “She’s in her room, sleeping.”

  I followed him, glad of his hand steadying me. “Kev said I’d killed his best friend. That was the real root of it, at least for him. Vince…I don’t know why he went along with Kev.”

  Devlin released me. “It’s true, you did kill his friend. But death is one of the risks of working for me. You were only defending yourself.”

  I hadn’t been looking for a pep talk on the rightness of my actions. Maybe this was him trying to make me feel better? “I’ll see you later.”

  Dev kissed me, then gave me a hard look. “Tell Theo, if he wants to come, I’ll leave one of them for him. He has a right for vengeance. You are his to protect as much as mine.”

  I nodded, trying not to give into the surreal feeling his words had created. “I’ll tell him.”

  Devlin went downstairs. I knocked on Serena’s door.

  She opened it, her face streaked with tears. “Lash already told me, Sar.”

  Damn it, Lash. “I’m sorry—”

  She got up and hugged me. “It’s not your fault,” she said. “Lash told me what happened.”

  I hugged her back, and didn’t say anything.

  “I should’ve known,” she said softly. “Kev had fantasies; he asked me to—”

  “Stop!” I said harshly. “Please Serena, I don’t want to know.”

  “Vince never said or did anything. I don’t want to believe it.”

  I hugged her harder. “I’m sorry. I know you cared about him—”

  “I do, but that doesn’t mean I blame you for this,” she whispered, letting go of me and stepping back. “I’ll see you when you come next time.” She closed her door gently in my face.

  We both needed some time. “I’ll see you then,” I said aloud, and turned away.

  I teleported to Danial’s, ending up in the snow on the lawn. In my haste, I’d forgotten my coat and my keys.

  Fuck, who cared? My first priority was getting to a shower before anyone smelled snake scent on me. I went to the front door and knocked lightly, praying Mary was on duty.

  Instead, Danial opened it a moment later
dressed in his robe, clearly annoyed. He took one look at me and knew immediately something was wrong. “What happened?” he said, reaching out to enfold me in his arms. “I can smell that snake on you from here—”

  As soon as he touched me, my strength evaporated. I dissolved into tears. “Some of Devlin’s bears tried to—”

  “Shh, Sar. I can guess the rest.” Danial walked me to the nearest phone, picked up the receiver, and began dialing.

  “You don’t need to talk to him,” I said, irritated. “He said he’d be by later.” I moved out of his embrace, then walked to his bathroom. “I need a shower.”

  Danial put down the phone and came after me. “The Lust raised with Lash?”

  I nodded, stripping off my clothes. “Don’t tell Theo. I don’t need him to have another hissy fit.”

  Danial nodded once. “He won’t hear it from me. Relax in my room when you’re done. No one will disturb you.” He turned and left.

  Had it been my anger or the scent of sex with Lash that had caused him to leave? It didn’t matter. I was a big girl. I would go shower, cry, and pull myself together.

  I took a long hot shower, wrapping my arms around myself as I sobbed out the delayed shock and fear. The familiar scent of my favorite blackberry shampoo soothed me, telling me I was safe, and that it didn’t matter what might have happened, only what had happened. I had gotten away from Kev and Vince. Lash had saved me. That was all that mattered. I told myself that over and over until I believed it.

  When I emerged, Danial was gone. I went looking for him and stumbled across Theoron and Elle in her room, playing a board game, Dark Tower.

  The old game was from my youth, back when computers were new and did only small things. The object was to journey completely around the board picking up keys and loot, and then when you’d made it back to your starting point, to challenge the tower. The most fun was going to tombs and ruins looking for treasure, because the computer chose for you at random what you would find.

  Once in a while, the tomb or ruin was empty. Sometimes there was gold, or a dragon-killing sword, or a flying horse. Often there were bad guys waiting for you in the dark, protecting those treasures. There was no way to know how many bad guys you’d have to fight. Most times there were only a few waiting when the door of the ruin creaked open. These could be easily beaten. Sometimes there were too many to fight, though. Then, like in life, you were doomed.

  Chapter Four

  Elle was the first to notice me standing at the door. “Mom!” she cried happily. “Today’s not your day to visit. I thought you were coming tomorrow!”

  “I’m early,” I said, forcing a smile. “Is that okay?”

  They both left their game and ran up to me. “Yes!”

  It felt so good to feel their little arms around me. I hugged them back, then quickly let them go, not wanting them to suspect how upset I was. “How’s your game?”

  “I’m beating him,” Elle said proudly.

  “You are not,” Theoron said snidely to her. “I’m using good strategy.” He looked up at me. “Want to play? We’re halfway through, but we could start again—”

  That meant he had to be losing. “No, you guys play,” I said, giving him a smile and ruffling his hair. “I’ll watch for a while.” Dark Tower was a long game. Sometimes it went on for three hours or more. Devlin wouldn’t have patience to wait if he arrived in mid-play.

  Two hours passed, Elle emerging the victor, though Theoron had only been a few moves behind. Through it all no one came looking for me or disturbed us.

  As they put the game away, I debated taking the kids out to an early dinner as a treat. But for that we needed a guard of some kind. Also, Danial wouldn’t like it if I left. Devlin would expect me to be here, too. I knew better than to think he’d understand. He wanted me right where he told me I should be…

  I pushed my bitter thoughts aside. Devlin hadn’t been anything but understanding, really. I was just grumpy—not that I wasn’t entitled to that—and I wanted nothing more than to spend tonight quietly with my family. I wanted comfort, love, and comfort food, too. I’d missed lunch.

  “Want me to make you some dinner?” I asked.

  “Yes,” they chorused. “We’re hungry.”

  Elle still ate raw meat as Theo did, just Theoron drank blood like Danial. Tonight however, it was going to be normal food. “Come on. I’ll make some sandwiches. After, we’ll make cookies.”

  * * * *

  We had just put the last batch of gingerbread cookies into the oven when Devlin walked into the kitchen.

  “Uncle Dev!” Theoron yelled. He ran to Dev, who had crouched down, his arms open to receive him. Devlin grabbed hold of Theoron, and swung him up into his arms. “We’re making cookies,” Theoron informed him.

  “So you are,” Devlin said with a smile. “Did you make me any?”

  “You don’t eat cookies,” Theoron laughed.

  “True,” Devlin said, laughing himself. “But I’d like some anyway, if you made them.” He put Theoron down, and came over towards me. “And how’s my lovely—”

  Elle blocked him.

  Annoyed, Devlin crouched down in front of her. “Little Lioness,” he purred softly. “What do you think you’re doing?”

  “I don't want you by Mom,” Elle growled. “Not until Dad comes back.”

  “Its okay, Elle—” I started.

  Devlin held up his hand. I fell silent.

  “Why not?” Devlin said, his golden eyes fixed on Elle. “Your Mom likes me to touch her, Elle. It’s my right to, as well. You know what the choker she wears means.”

  “I know what it means,” Elle hissed, bearing her fangs. “But I don’t trust you. I smell—”

  “Quiet, child,” Devlin said authoritatively. “I don’t have to explain myself to you. You will obey me—”

  “Stop it,” I ordered. “Dev, where are Theo and Danial?”

  “They came to help me,” Devlin said, making it clear to me by his tone what they had been helping him with. “Danial said he had a right as well. Kev and Vince are dead.”

  “Thank you.” My words were polite and clipped. Though I was happy those asses were gone, I’d assumed that and wanted not to ever hear their names again. Would Titus be disposing of the bodies? It was much better for me if I didn’t know.

  “You’re safe, Love,” he said softly, caressing me with his voice. “Lash had a talk with the others as well.”

  Most likely none of the bears, male or female, would be coming within ten feet of me for the foreseeable future. That was good, but it also ensured I’d never become friendly with Devlin’s guards the way I had with Danial’s. My sole friend there would be Serena. Maybe that was for the best, too. “Good.”

  “You were baking,” Devlin prompted. “For whom? Theo?”

  I’d just been keeping the kids and myself busy, but his comment reminded me I’d been going to make a cake for Theo’s birthday in May. I hadn’t decided if he’d want a surprise party. He’d spent so many birthdays alone. He might still look twenty-seven, but his face was growing older. There were faint lines on his brow now that had not been there when I’d met him years ago. Soon, despite his were genes, we would look almost the same age. After a few more years passed, he would began to look even older than me…

  “Sar?”

  I was scared about that. When Theo was very old, things would change between us. At the least, he would resent Danial and Devlin for keeping their youth. Would he come to resent me, as well?

  “Sar?” Devlin said sternly. “What’s the matter? You look ill.”

  What was wrong with me? “I’m okay.” I forced a smile. “Do you really want some cookies?”

  “I’ll take some for Lash,” Devlin said meaningfully. “If you don’t mind.”

  I began putting some into a bag. “Of course.”

  Lash might be my lover, but he was not my friend. Still, I gave business associates cookies, so giving him some wouldn’t be too odd. We were c
oworkers of a sort, with me still feeling like a guest at Hayden instead of its mistress. After all the work I had done there, it didn’t feel like home to me. Now, after what had happened today, I doubted it ever would.

  Maybe that was best. Dev was going to get bored with me in a few years or so, just like Theo had said. There would come a time when my attention and love wouldn’t be enough, even with him getting more on the side. When he told me it was over, I wouldn’t be going to Hayden anymore. I would be missing him enough; I didn’t need to miss friends, too.

  “Love,” Devlin said, enfolding me in his arms. “Please don’t look so sad. Tell me what’s wrong. Tell me what I can do to help.”

  I tucked the bag in his pocket. “I’m all over the place,” I whispered, worried. “My mood shifts in seconds from happiness to depression. I felt like this earlier today.”

  He kissed me gently on the cheek, then turned me to face him. “You’ve been through a shock. This is normal, Sar. Just remember you are loved and safe. I’m here for you.”

  I gazed at him. It was hard not to be spellbound. He was so handsome with his golden hair, his molten gold eyes, his features that were sculpted, but unquestionably male.

  “I love you,” he said passionately, touching my nose with his. “Yes, you.”

  It was his charisma that really drew me to him, the way he posed so casually with that gleam in his eyes inches from my lips. His bearing said he was here for me, that he was already thinking of the many ways he wanted to caress me. God, it was enough just to watch him like this and think…

  “Mom, the cookies are burning!” Elle said loudly.

  I jumped, startled. “Take them out.”

  “Theo and Danial should be along shortly,” Devlin purred. “They are showering.” He smiled slightly. “It was necessary.”

  Eww. I busied myself with the cookies, removing them from the baking sheet Elle held..

  Devlin crouched down and beckoned to Theoron, who ran into his arms with glee again. “You, Little Prince, are going out with Theo, Lash, and your sister to a movie tonight.” He handed Theoron fifty dollars. “That’s for treats,” Devlin said generously. “Make sure you get enough popcorn for everybody, including Theo.”